Jordan B. Peterson reads you a bedtime story

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Ned Jeffery : Your Peterson impression is amazing! The timing and little stumbles are spot on.

advancedlamb : the burger king way of making it sound was a little better

Rationalific : This is still great, but not quite up to the level of the Burger King one, which could fool pretty much anyone. I think you may be trying a bit too hard with this one, especially the extra stress (like "so WHAT are we gonna DO?") on certain words (which you did perfectly in the Burger King one, but is done a bit too harshly here). Also, I find that the more technical and jargon-filled vocabulary makes for better impressions (and the Burger King one had more of that). If you had the Burger King script written for you, see if you can team up with that person again. I think you can really become popular for your Jordan Peterson impressions. Just don't turn your impression into an impression. Keep it real, and you'll be fine, as you're still the best one out there that I've ever heard.

Weightlifted : this was great the first one was legendary. uncanny to the point of being surreal

Funaru : You should ask Freedom Toons for a collab - he's done some videos with a halfly decent Peterson impression in them but nothing can beat yours! His Shapiro is on point though, so this would be a perfect combination. :)

J FU : Lmao the ending was the best. Oh are you asleep? Aha gotcha

Gabriel Alfaia : I mean, they are pigs... That's no joke,man.

Sweenz Seven : The Three Little Pigs is a powerful verbal tradition carrying the traditional, subconscious awareness of world cultures throughout a millennia to clean your room.

Mr.Pat : The first impression was better.

Swipei Kool : Attack like this, with your foot out

Pyagrl*16 : I'll have to stop listening to this and resume in the morning. Everyone's asleep and I want to scream after every sentence, this is so brilliant.

Spideysenses67 : This was so close to being accurate that it is scary.

Christian Wilson : Damn this is very impressive. Bruh do Joe Rogan and it'll be a hit. Or Ben Shapiro. Or whatever you want, this stuff is great keep on keepin on

Chuu Etteck My R : Dude you need to do an hour long bit on this idea XD

Peter Johnson : "Is that a product from single motherhood you ask? The pigs search for their father but they find the wolf. The wolf represents the GULAGs which are the archetypcal structure of my home. My wife won't stop telling me what to do which castrated me in early childhood, methaphoricaly speaking, like the pigs. It was hard. So damn hard being a child in Canada and if you read about the GULAGs you know because you have the communist party which are my mother-in-law, my wife and now my daughter and poor castrated me . As you know Carl Jung once said in his famous book "The cure for faggots" that castration is the only sure path to salvation methaphoricaly speaking. That's why I became Kermit the Frog because I met my wife before reaching puberty and she did what she knows best - castration. And that's when you realize you have the potential to be something. You can't be Peter Pan forever and you become Kermit. Bloody Kermit for God's sake! And it is not easy. I can tell you because I've been a clinical psychologist for over 30 years and a patient with mental health issues for over 40. The moment I stopped taking my pills they called me from the University of Toronto. I had the needed level of retardation to teach in UT but I asked them about the GULAGs and they told me that communism has ended. I realized that I can get much more money and even save as much by not taking my Xanax." -Peter Jordonson ( Jordan Peterson's DID persona)

Jim Crow : Very nice, though it seemed like you lost your mental image a few times. This is a bit different from his usual though so it's harder hold on to.

Caleb Pearl : I'm crying with laughter. This is going to hit 10 million views.

Traplover7 : It would be mad funny if you said things that's the opposite of JP's ideology in his voice lmao

Tony Hope : Spot on man. I mean seriously.

Jan Jegen : The burger king one took me a while to even comprehend it was an impression

John Constantine : Aha. Gotcha! This is fantastic.

Anon 55555555555555555 : lol

HT O : A PRIORI

Joshua Bailey : Ha, gotcha!

Nessie Andrew : I can image his gestures too.

Mitchell Gillett : I think one thing missing from your impression is the kind of frog in the throat quality of his voice, like he needs to clear his throat but never does

Ryan Morris : omg crying laughing

A R : Ill be a regular now see you next vid

Dislocated Thumb : Three Little Gibs

Stephen Lynx : The burger king one sounds better, IMO.

Mindy Schaper : Excellent script and acting.

Ryan Task : Jesus Christ this is fantastic

Mr. Ford-Man : We can't forget the "devouring mother" aspect of the story. She wants to keep her children with her forever, but can't because of a lack of resources and skills. The absence of a father figure in the home would explain the fact that his children lacked the skills to create a proper shelter and make it in big bad world which is represented by the wolf. You better bloody well believe the world is one terrifying place. Just ask anyone who was ever attacked by a wolf and they will tell you.

Brandon Ette : We live in a "Transcendental Metaphysical Hierarchy of ACTIONS and Responsibilities. Pay your debts, and Give to everyone. Clean your Room, and receive your Recompense."

Robert Baur : ok..ok.. Now the reality assumes objective capacity for three animals to build houses. Fist ok I don't want to get ahead of my self now because its important not to gloss OVER the main point The pigs are entrusted to build houses for themselves in which to live. And what does a house represent? Well its a living place a habitat a place where you spend a good proportion of your time. Its the psychological representation or embodiment of of one's own general conscious existence which we all know is mysterious like REALLY mysterious. The houses will represent in each case (mind you) what kind of standards by which the pigs will live by The are literally building their entire identities and making a stand in ONE place almost as if to announce to the world and to themselves "THIS is who I am YES!" One builds his house out of straw one out of sticks and the other out of bricks. What does this begin to look like now if you really think about it.. a dominance hierarchy yes! Straw! (the weakest) second sticks...a little stronger more durable than straw..and Bricks YES bricks the strongest material Ok so the materials are chosen literally... in... that... ORDER The story indicates that such a hierarchy is natural by depicting pigs to exemplify the main characters rather than humans whom and whom normally live in a sty rather than houses as people do. Animals are generally thought of a being in the natural world. Though the story could just as easily have used lobsters whom also naturally form hierarchies as well but pigs make the point so much better I THINK because people tend to think of pigs as greedy creatures And you know people are greedy too like pigs You would know that if you ever read Animal Farm by George Orwell another story which depicts pigs as not being different from men whom are depicted as greedy and corruptible and is generally thought of as a warning against Stalinist Communism. Ok..ok so where is this all heading... One day a big bad wolf. The wolf is a predator of sorts it can't be reasoned with All it wants to do is EAT you The story also indicates the wolf is bad..notice not hungry which would be a more accurate neutral perspective of the materialists in the world whom cannot take a bloody moral stand on anything. No the wolf IS bad its written right into the text of the document. Ok so the wolf demands approaching the first straw house "little pig...little pig let me in!" The pig refuses "not by the hair on my chiny chin chin" as if that would be enough and whose weak house ultimately destroyed The wolf says "I will huff and I will puff and I will blow your house in!" See when bad things happen in life and you DON'T build your moral character on strong enough foundation it will literally destroy you Even if its seemingly EASIER less effort to build your life out of straw..,its a dark lesson which is why these stories are so important to teach to children all these days whom have iphones and expect the world to change how they speak using different gender pronouns just for you. Well if YOU think you can just easily avoid the wolves of this world you got another thing coming bucko! The wolves are out there YES! and they will eat you if THAT is what you are after. The lazy pig whom was lesser in the hierarchy was easily consumed by the predator whom did not give the pig a second of moral consideration and that's rough man But we all know its what is going to happen. The wolf does not care who you are even if you have good intentions its what you build that matters. So naturally the same thing happens to the second pig whom built his house out of sticks. The second pig is like he knows he should not build it out of straw but is not willing to put the real effort in He cuts corners. But the third pig... The third pig built his house out of strong materials The wolf could not get in And that's the brilliance of the third pig because he prepared for the wolves of the world whereas the other just skirted by expecting no problems to come along. He was not going to sacrifice security stability for comfort of the other others whom took the EASY but not the best path

Janez : This one has more of a "reading the script" feeling, but Burger King also had more context to make it funnier.

Matthew Ferris : I love this - your vocabulary and intonation are perfect. Definitely deserves more views

tom jones : If you're going to read from the post by /u/superconductiverabbi, why don't you give us a link to the post? You know how hard it is to search a user's post history for a specific post?

Lauryn White : Somebody please show Jordan this, this is amazing 😂😂

Kyle Kilgore : The best part is how what you're saying isn't complete bullshit

fabian padilla : Kermit the frog reads a bedtime story

David Runtic : Any chance you could do a collab with dogbeef or SHAMIEN? I bet it would be absolutely hilarious combining your voice with their memes.

Robert Baur : still a better love story than twilight

Lomax : 463 subscribers 244 likes... I'm just planting my flag on this beautiful channel before I forget. I should've done it earlier. Keep this up and you'll get millions of hits! Can you do a Shapiro voice?

Justin Yates : dude this is so amazingly well done, so so fkn amazing

SilverArse : The metaphor is about toughening up your mental exterior. So that when the wolf of criticism attempts to blow down your ideologies, they are and therefore you are capable of withstanding them.

Dave : you can use “and we’ll just put that on the side for now.” Says that when he wants to present an idea but not dive into it

michaelterry1000 : Bravo, that was not only very clever but you did what I thought to be impossible. Both supporters and adversaries of Peterson will enjoy this.

Pedro Augusto : you should do more

Greg Taillon : okay but the very end of this is hilarious